It Matters How This Ends
by Casa Circe
Summary: "I'd rather have even one memory to hold onto," Eries told him earnestly, "than a lifetime of dwelling on what could have been."


_**It Matters How This Ends**_

Disclaimer: I do not own Escaflowne otherwise Folken and Eries would have been together.

NOTE: _This was inspired by "All I Ask" by Adele. As soon as I heard that song, I thought of Folken and Eries and then, I just had to write this fic. It's fairly familiar territory and following Folken's fate in the series (as much as I try to rewrite that part every time I write a story for them.) The song just fit them so perfectly. Seriously, please listen to it and you will understand._

 _So prepare as I give in to a lot of my cheesiness and also attempt at some decent smut for the song is basically a pretty way of describing smexytimes, there are a few such scenes here. I wasn't sure how far I'd be able to go while writing. The scenes aren't super explicit, smut-wise, but they are already the most explicit Folken x Eries story I've written so far. So I'll keep the rating up, just to be on the safe side. Hopefully, the scenes are not too cringe-inducing._

 _I've had this idea for a while now but decided that today would be a good date to post it, given the title. So here is my last fanfic for 2015!_

 _Happy New Year!_

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Eries Aston frowned as she re-read the note.

He had explained everything in that concise, matter-of-fact way of his. The truth about his wings turning black. The need for him to make amends, that part she knew well enough. And his plans to leave for Zaibach in the morning for one final confrontation. From which he would not return.

She had found it inserted in a book on the political history of Gaea that he had borrowed some weeks back which he had casually returned to her after the last council meeting, making no indication that there was anything inside it. She had been too preoccupied to notice anything until hours later, when she sat alone in her chambers.

Clever.

A calculated move, leaving her no chance to protest. She would have expected nothing less from him.

The note was his way of saying good-bye. But she refused to accept it.

If Folken Fanel thought that she was simply going to leave things at that, then he was sorely mistaken.

.

.

.

"If you intended to avoid me, then you aren't been very effective about it."

Folken turned to face the princess who stared at him calmly, her poise belying the strength of the emotions she felt. But the intensity of her gaze hid nothing and for a moment, Folken could not meet her eyes.

It had not taken her long to find him, leaving the library and walking down the hallway that led to his laboratory. Knowing him, preparations for his departure were most likely already done. At this point, he was probably just passing the time before he had to confront his fate.

He knew her well enough to know that she would seek him out after reading his note. And this was a very likely place for him to be. He had written the note to avoid an uncomfortable confrontation and to attempt a painless parting. And yet he could not resist wandering those halls in the hope of seeing her one last time.

Folken sighed. For all his careful planning, he had self-sabotaged.

It was too late now. There she was, determined and defiant, just as he had expected her to be, silently forbidding him to leave. And he knew he was powerless to refuse her.

"Princess," he said softly as she approached him.

They stood close to one another, no longer maintaining a respectable distance. The world was falling apart around them. The time for propriety was past. There was so much left unresolved, so much that they had tried to ignore in the past weeks, that they had refused to admit even to themselves. But they had always been aware of this thing between them, and now was the only chance to do anything about it.

The timing was unfortunate; that was clear enough. Had circumstances been different…

But it was useless to speculate. Nothing would change the truth that this was a tragedy before it even began.

"In the end, the note was not enough," he admitted, "I suppose I wanted to say good-bye in person."

No matter how painful it would be, he added silently.

Folken looked at her and shook his head sadly. She frowned.

"There's nothing to be done, I'm afraid," he said gravely.

"I disagree," she replied defiantly.

"Princess," he protested.

"You think that doing nothing about this is the better option," she argued, "and we've both tried to follow our reason on this matter, tried to ignore what is there, and we aren't any happier for it."

Folken simply stared at her gravely.

"If you think that you are sparing me from heartbreak," she said ruefully, "you're not. It is too late for that."

She looked away for a moment, her lips pursed and her fists clenched. Folken stared at her in surprise and saw that she was struggling to hold back tears. His first instinct was to reach out to comfort her but, as always, he restrained himself. But for the first time, he felt on the verge of faltering.

"Then, I am truly sorry," he said earnestly.

"Why should you be?" Eries replied bitterly, "This is not your fault. Nor mine. But here we are."

Folken could not help but admire the succinct way she had described their complex circumstances. She was nothing if not efficient, even in matters of the heart, it seemed.

After all, they didn't have the time for long-winded speeches and awkward confessions. They had always had a mutual understanding that went beyond words. And at that moment, their eyes said everything they needed to say.

Emboldened by the moment, Folken extended his good hand and took one of hers, raising it to his lips gently. Eries tensed at the sudden contact but then, immediately relaxed, feeling safe with him.

"I know very well that there is no future for this, for us," she whispered, moving closer to him, "But don't you see?"

She raised the hand he had taken to stroke the side of his face. It was Folken's turn to tense but he leaned into her touch and waited for her next words.

"I'd rather have even one memory to hold onto," Eries said earnestly, "than a lifetime of dwelling on what could have been."

Folken's eyes widened as his gaze met hers. He saw more than the sorrow he had wanted to prevent, more than her frustration with the circumstances, he saw a deep longing and tenderness. And for the first time in so long, he knew he was capable of returning such feelings.

"If this is to be my last night with you," Eries continued sadly with conviction, "then let it be a night of facing the truth, no more dancing around or avoiding what we both know to be real."

Folken said nothing but took her hand from his face and tenderly brushed his lips over the inside of her wrist, conscious of the pounding of his own heart. He caught her sharp intake of breath and saw that she still retained her poise. But the passion in her eyes was unmistakeable.

She leaned even closer, and he followed suit, until there was barely any distance between them. But still he hesitated and she sensed this.

"All I ask is," Eries whispered, "please don't leave me with nothing."

Before Folken could respond to this, Eries quickly closed the gap between them and pressed her lips to his. Folken froze and the kiss was tentative at first. But he soon gave in, and returned it with a passion that surprised them both.

Eries curled one hand into the fabric of his shirt and she pulled him to her. She felt as he wrapped his arms around her, his fingers digging into her back. There was no going back now. Not that they wanted to. They had awakened a powerful need in each other which begged to be satiated.

Though they were still safe in the shadows, they were suddenly aware that some more privacy was preferable. Reluctantly, they broke away and stared at each other, flushed. Recovering first, Eries took charge. Folken let her lead him away from the corridor. If anyone knew about secure, discreet locations in the palace, it was Eries and it did not take long for her to find a suitably vacant bedchamber.

Once inside, they felt slightly embarrassed. But then, they remembered how little time they had left. They soon began to remove their clothing as they approached the bed. For a moment, Folken threw an uneasy glance at his mechanic arm but this did not escape Eries' notice. She gave him an encouraging smile and took his metal arm and placed in around her waist. Folken pulled her into another kiss which she returned passionately.

At first, keenly aware that this was the only chance for them to be together this way, they moved with an almost alarming urgency, frantically clutching at each other, exploring as much of each other as they could. After spending ages maintaining respectful distances and having restrained interactions, they were determined to make up for lost time. They needed to be as close as possible. Eries wrapped her legs around Folken tightly as he moved deeper inside of her, until they melted into each other completely.

After the first wave of passion, they settled into a more relaxed rhythm that was nevertheless, still intensely profound. They took the time to really look at each other and to even exchange endearments. Not openly sentimental by nature, their admissions of their feelings in more explicit terms as an expression of complete trust in the other was in itself, an act whose intimacy surpassed the physical.

Eries saw his beauty and remained un-repulsed by his metal arm, a part of him he had always been conscious about. No one had ever been so completely accepting of him, especially not Folken himself. He had never met someone so wonderful. As, he gazed at her in pure awe, he resolved to do all he could to please her.

Folken trailed kisses down Eries' neck as she threaded her fingers through his hair. They touched each other gently, tracing the scars on their skin, and committing every detail to memory. Folken would treasure every moment for as long as he drew breath and Eries knew that whatever happened in the future, she would never have this with anyone else.

Their fingers intertwined, they moved together as one and afterwards, they simply lay in each other's arms, enjoying a peace they had never known in all the tumult of their lives. They could not sleep; time was too precious for that. So they talked, more openly and freely than they had ever had.

Certain topics were to be avoided, such as Folken's impending doom and their inevitable parting. Zaibach too was a subject that caused too much pain. For once, they wanted to discuss things divorced from their harsh realities. So they both settled on the relatively conflict-free periods of their lives, Folken shared his memories of Fanelia, and Eries her memories of when her mother and older sister were still alive.

"It was a simple life," Folken mused, "but not wholly without conflict. Even if my path had not led somewhere else, I'm not sure I would have been completely content just following in my father's footsteps."

"You were always meant to make a legacy of your own," Eries remarked, "As long as i've known you, you have always been an agent of change. It was your choice of allegiance that usually complicated things."

"And you who have been fiercely loyal all your life," Folken replied, "no one more dedicated to duty and to family. You will leave a great legacy too. An image of stability and constancy in a world plunged into chaos."

"You flatter me," Eries replied with a smile.

"You deserve more praise," Folken told her, "and I hope that soon, the people around you will be able to appreciate your qualities as much as I have come to."

"Perhaps, not quite like you," Eries teased.

Folken smiled warmly at her, and for a moment he was that young prince of Fanelia once more.

They remained entangled in each other's arms until the first stirrings of dawn. They knew then that this was truly time to say goodbye. But somehow, as painful as this was going to be, having finally bared their souls to each other made the sorrow somewhat lighter to bear.

But before leaving for good, Folken and Eries stood together on one of the balconies of the palace and watched the dawn break over the city, the soft glow spreading over the rooftops. It was a glorious sight to behold and they cherished this final moment together, bathed in the light of the sun.

Slowly, they turned to face each other and kissed for the last time. They leaned their foreheads against each other, savoring these few precious moments.

"I will never forget you," Eries whispered tenderly.

"Neither will I," Folken whispered back.

No more words needed to be spoken. Reluctantly, they pulled away from each other and after a final, lingering glance, they both turned around. This was how they had decided to say their farewells, and they were grateful that for what it was worth, they were able to part on their own terms.

They both took a deep breath before taking the first steps, walking in opposite directions. They had promised that neither of them would look back, no matter how much they were tempted. Doing so would only make things even more difficult.

So, mustering all their courage, Folken and Eries began to walk away. After several steps they both stopped in their tracks, still slightly aware of the other's presence and unable to move forward. They stood very still and fought the temptation to turn around to even glimpse at the other.

"It's better this way," they thought to convince themselves, "to falter now will only be more painful."

They stood thus for a few, agonizing moments. Still so near but knowing they must not give in to this weakness. Simultaneously, they sighed, and began creating more distance between them. Eries clenched her fists and focused all her energy on putting one foot in front of the other. She would get through this somehow. She would be strong enough.

A few moments passed and then she heard a soft fluttering sound. She did not need to turn around to know that Folken had unfurled his wings and was soaring to meet his destiny. He had not shown her his wings when they were alone because they served as such a painful reminder of what was to come.

But when Eries noticed several black feathers floating in the wind, she reached out to take one and then held it to her heart.


End file.
